DARKMAN
NOTICE: A non-computer-using friend saw this movie and is using my account to review it. After (if) I see the movie I may (or may not) issue a contradictory review. Or maybe even one that compounds his criticisms.
DARKMAN
The first thing I'd like to say is that Gene Siskel, Roger Ebert, and Rex Reed are all wrong. This film sucks.
The premise, that a man can change his face merely by changing the skin on top of it, with no regard to any difference in the shape of his skull, is hopeless. If you feel like accepting this, it would help if the scientist responsible for inventing this skin came across as intelligent rather than as a retard who grunts through the film without uttering a single piece of intelligible dialogue. (DISCLAIMER: I have nothing against retards. I just don't think they make believable scientists). Add to this the fact that all of his skin reconstruction work is performed with materials salvaged from a completely annihilated laboratory, reconstructed in a disused factory with no explanation as to who is paying the power bill.
If you feel like accepting all of this, you must deal with a head villain capable of wiping out forty-odd of a competitor's muscle-men, using only one gun and lacking any cover. You must deal with the idea (we cannot call it a fact) that the fake skin alone is enough to fool numerous "bad guys" into believing that our "hero" is who he pretends to be, faulty mannerisms (and lack of knowledge) notwithstanding. (I mean let's face it: it's easy to fool us, as we're willing to suspend our disbelief, and every time he has assumed a new personality they merely used the actor who portrayed the role that he is assuming, but when you are dealing with a person close up, and you haven't suspended your disbelief, you're going to note nervousness and fake skin. And come on: criminals are a suspicious lot anyway).
If you want to accept all of this, I should tell you that the plot is essentially the same as that of ROBOCOP, with the big corporate bad guy with his right-hand-man who destroy the hero only to have him come back to life and hunt them down. I'm not comparing this film to robocop, as it lacks all the satire and intense pacing and genuine suspense of that film. If you need to see this story again, rent Robocop from a video store.
If you *still* want to see this film, I can't help you. But please, go alone. This is without a doubt the worst film I've ever seen, and I've seen a lot of films.
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