Scream 2 (1997)

reviewed by
Bert Gene


Scream 2 (1997) 

tag line: "Someone (could it be the producers?) has taken their love for Sequels too far"

The much over-hyped Scream 2--directed by horror-veteran Wes Cavern (first known for his Halloween films) and written by the industry's latest hip screenwriter Kevin Smith---exemplifies the latest tastelessness and greed of Hollywood franchise movie-making in unrelenting pursuit of the ole mighty dollar by hitting its Gen-X viewers over the head with its bag of tired plot twists and hollow characters. For a couple of film makers known for having a track record for "getting it" in terms of knowing what the audience expects, Scream 2 shows that Cavern and Smith do NOT definitely "get it" this time around.

This "must see sequel" begins with the sneak preview of "Stab" with Maureen McCormick (Jada Pinkett of Facts of Life) and Phil Stevens (Cuba Gooding Jr.of Jerry Maguire) bitching about how long the damn line is. At one point, smart-mouth Jada does well to sum up the mood of most of the viewers, "I don't wanna see some dumbass white movie about some dumbass white girl being chased by some dumbass killer." For me personally, I don't wanna see a dumbass movie of any dumbass nationality period!

They finally get inside the theater where we constantly cut to scenes of "Stab" which is just a poor excuse to use clips from the original movie Scream. This is just a lame gimmick for the studios to save a buck, last seen in Back to the Future Part 2 where they used numerous footage from the original movie.

However, one difference is that they unsuccessfully attempted to disguise this trick through today's technological advancement in visual effects. What they do is they CGI the new faces over the original actors face. For instance, Tori Spelling (of Melrose Place) is morphed over Neve Campbell (of Party of Five) in the role of Sidney for the movie "Stab." Last time I checked CGI is pretty expensive...what was Miramax thinking? Did they watch too many Robert Zemeckis flicks?...this explains the the Back to the Future Part 2 influence.

The smarter thing to do would've been the old fashion method...hire NEW ACTORS to play the roles! But again why would Tori Spelling be stupid enough to accept a part in this sequel when she was the main butt of jokes in the original. Tori would be the last to wanna play some dumbass white girl in this movie. No wonder they had to CGI Tori for this film.

Not only does this CGI scheme backfire the studio's plan to save money, but it also just plain insults the audience's intelligence...what idiot would not notice the horrible cheesy CGI effects?! Everyone knows Tori does not look that grotesque on the big screen. Last time I've check, Tori was a blond bombshell, not some sagging bleached brunnette.

Anyways back to the story...if there is one. Returning in the sequel are the survivors of the first original horrid horror film: hapless idiot Sidney (Neve Campbell), superbitch reporter Gale (Courtney Love), video-geek Randy (Jamie Kennedy), OJ wannabe Cotton (Liev Taylor) and asinine security guard Dewey (David Arquette).

Also joining them are a crop new stabbing victims up for Ghostface's picking. They are Sarah Jessica Gellar (Buffy the Vampire Slayer), Jerry O'Connel (Stand By Me, Star Trek), Elise Neal (A Different World), and Laurie Metcalf (Roseanne). These characters are never really developed and just are brainless cattle that add to the sequels higher bodycount.

And for the plot? Well, being too stupid to take a relaxing trip to Europe, Sidney and the rest of them decide to go to college where there's nothing more like calculus homework to soothe one from the emotional trauma of being almost butchered the previous year.

As soon as the copy cat killer makes its presence known on campus, the movie shoves its copy cat script of the original up the audience's naive ass. Instead of a bunch of superficial high schoolers, the movie sets its havoc amongst superficial sorority gals and fraternity brats whose lives are already complicated enough with big problems such as finding kegs, eating pizza, and getting laid. (Lots of change between high school and college hey?) These characters get so much of the audience's sympathy that when one is killed by Spookface, yawns from the audience fill the theater with a great sense of loss (...of attention that is).

Moreover, the sequel constantly backfires on itself by the way it continues to unintentionally remind the audience of how awful the movie is. In particular, at one point we watch a scene with a bunch of uptight film students discussing how awful sequels are compared to its predecessor. Was the writer and director too oblivious to see this inside joke that we the audience chuckled at? Why in the hell would you keep reminding an audience that's watching a sequel that sequels suck? That's like Taco Bell telling its customers to their face that the burritos they're eating will give them diarrhea.

To avoid being castrated by the latest Scream fanatic, I won't reveal details of who gets killed and what happens. You'll just have to waste the 7 bucks yourself to find out.

One thing I can tell is that you don't have to be a psychic to figure that there's gonna be a part 3 sometime in the near future.

An Idea for Kevin Smith: In "Scream 3," the killers behind the masks are a fat, four-eyes movie critic and his boney-ass bald partner, trying to discredit horror movies so they won't have to sit through anymore and then get their heads shot by Sidney so regular folks don't have to listen their bitchy and moaning critiques anymore either.

I hope one day Kevin goes back to making witty twenty-something films instead of writing worthless horror trash.

Reviewman

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