Twister (1996)

reviewed by
Jason Wallis


"Twister" (1996) 
A Film Review by Jason Wallis 
"Twister" * 
Starring Helen Hunt, Bill Paxton, Cary Elwes, Jami Gertz, Lois Smith and
Alan Ruck 
Directed by Jan De Bont 

What in the hell is wrong with conteporary Hollywood? Don't they realize that almost every single one of their big-budget blockbusters suck? Obviously not, because they just keep on turning out the same, tired ol' run of the mill formula flicks. I mean, just look at the last couple years. This year, we had the latest "Batman" flick. What started out as a brilliantly realized, stark, gothic series of great films directed by the master of the macabre himself, Tim Burton, has turned into a franchise. Then they ditched Burton and Keaton and came out with the sorriest excuse for an action film I have ever had the misfortune of seeing. Now, they have a better Batman (George Clooney, by the way), but some of the stupidest villians in recent memory (though Poisen Ivy was great). Look at the kinds of lines we got: "Ice to see you. Chill out." C'mon! And how can we forget "Speed 2: Cruise Control"? They took what is very possibly the greatest action film in the past ten years and spent, like, 170 million dollars (or something like that) to make a crap sequel that did about 70 million at the box office! And then you have the queen of them all: "Twister".

Okay, don't worry. I'm done ranting and raving about how stupid Hollywood is and I'm actually going to start talking about the "film".

"Twister", like I said, is the queen of all crappy summer movies. It has absolutly no character development, no plot twists (hell, it barely even has a plot) and basically no script. This is an empty film. And what's sad is that it doesn't even do what it was meant to do. Some of my favorite movies are empty films. Just look at the films of Jackie Chan or Bruce Lee. They have horrible acting and essentially no direction, but they thrilled the hell out of me. Those are four star flicks. This is a travesty to the art of film-making.

Face it: this is not even a fun movie! Even "Independence Day", as bad as it was, had at least some redeeming qualities. This has nothing. And what's even more depressing is that they actually could have taken this somewhere if they had just written a decent script. They FX are fantastic and you have some of the best actors and actresses working in Hollywood: you've got Bill Paxton ("One False Move", "Aliens") as the storm chaser turned weather man; Jamie Gertz (who was great in "Sibling Rivalry") as his new fiance; and finally Alan Ruck (very under-rated; just look at "Ferris Bueller's Day Off") as one of the other chasers. With a cast like that, you should at least have a two-and-a-half to three star movie on your hands.

Well, Jan De Bont (fresh off of "Speed" - the film, not the drug) screws it up royaly. I'm not even going to go into plot details 'cause you all know what it's about and even how it's gonna end. It's that predictible.

If you are looking for a good action/adventure film to rent tonight, please look elsewhere. In fact, if you want a good action film, you're going to have to go off the new release shelf and look into the older film of yesteryear. That is where you will find the truly great action films: "Aliens", "Lethal Weapon", "The Killer", "Enter the Dragon", "Jaws" or even (dare I say it?) "Mortal Kombat". Any of these movies are better than this, or anything else Hollywood has put out recently. Skip it.

Check out Jason Wallis' Filmaholics Anonymous web page at http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Boulevard/7475


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