THE POSTMAN Grade: F (I'd rather be on fire for three hours than sit through this one again)
Directed by Kevin Costner Written for the Screen by Brian Helgeland and Eric Roth from the Novel by David Brin Starring: Costner, Will Patton (No Way Out), Olivia Williams, Larenz Tate (Dead Presidents) Year of Release: 1997 Rating: R
Deserves Recognition for: Achieving the near-impossible task of making a grander monument to self-love than Steven Seagal's On Deadly Ground.
Capsule Review: A question: After the floating Baby Ruth that was WATERWORLD, what in the @$&% were the Hollywood execs who gave Kevin Costner the money to make another post-apocalyptic movie thinking? In this 3 hour advertisement for his new hair weave, Costner plays a nameless drifter who dons a long dead Postal employee's uniform and gradually turns a nuked-out USA into an idealized hippy-dippy society. (Judging by the costuming at the end of the movie, the main accomplishment of this brave new world is in re-inventing polyester.) When he's not pointing the camera directly at himself, director Costner does have a nice visual sense, and it is undeniably fascinating to see such an unabashedly jingoistic film in the trust-no-one 90's; but by the time the second hour rolled around, I was reduced to sitting on my hands to keep from clawing out my own eyes. Mark this one "Return to Sender".
Copyright 1998 by The Critic formerly known as Andrew Wright For more insanely biased reviews, check out http://www.seanet.com/~louk/ e-mail louk@seanet.com
"Saturday Night Thing. Drunken Hillbilly Bar Fight. My Soul Rejoices."
A Haiku in honor of ROADHOUSE A9Andrew L. Wright esq.
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