BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER
A film review by Too FAT Guys
Copyright 1992 by Roger & Me
Roger: Heard any good jokes lately?
Roger: Yeah, someone told me that there was a new vampire movie coming
out. And get this, the hero is a valley girl cheerleader.
Roger: Ha ha. So funny, I forgot to laugh.
Roger: In this cinematic extravaganza, Kristy Swanson plays Buffy, an undisciplined, frivolous, vacuous, valley girl cheerleader. Unfortunately for her, vampirism seems to be big in LA this year. Shortly, she is informed by Merrick (Donald Sutherland) that she is the Chosen One, slayer of vampires. He takes Buffy under his wing and trains her to fight the vampire Lothos (Rutger Hauer), and his evil henchman (Paul Reubens). Luke Perry appears as Pike, Buffy's love interest.
Roger: I get the impression that this film had a lot of late changes
made. For instance, we never see why Buffy doesn't sleep with
her boyfriend (not Pike) after having apparently made
arrangements to do so. Another example is the unexplained
relationship between Buffy and Lothos, and Merrick and Lothos.
Lothos and Merrick repeatedly say that Buffy is "not ready."
It's not clear what she's not ready for or how she would go
about getting ready. The latter example, perhaps was just not
in the film, but the former problem seems to have been
introduced in the editing room.
Roger: I would have liked to see the relationships between Lothos and
Merrick and Buffy explored more also. Or at all. The film
shows us that throughout the ages, there have always been
slayers and trainers to fight Lothos. As a courtesy, it would
have been nice to know where these people came from. Merrick
says that it takes years to train a slayer. It would also be
nice to know what Lothos does in the off season, other than
wait for a new slayer to harass him.
Roger: Of course, it's not particularly clear that the slayer is there to annoy Lothos. There is a strong undertone of Merrick's collusion with Lothos, perhaps that Merrick's real job is to train slayers for Lothos's consumption, not destruction. Another completely spurious bit of plot relates to some of Merrick's instructions. Buffy draws on them, during her final confrontation with Lothos. Despite having heard them twice, during the film, it is still unclear to me what these instructions were supposed to mean.
Roger: There's a lot of dialog that seems to go nowhere in this
movie. There wasn't any particular theme that I could
discern. They make a few false starts towards making a
statement about gender roles, but they never go beyond that.
The acting was acceptable. Kristy Swanson has mastered the art
of vacuity, she'll do well in Hollywood. Paul Reubens was
amusing in his supporting role.
Roger: Just in general, I wasn't impressed by any of the acting. It
doesn't surprise me tho, since much of the dialog was bordering
on insipid. It would have taken someone more brilliant than,
say, Rutger Hauer to shine through this mess. I'm not exactly
sure how I liked the action. Was it just my innate sexism that
caused me to enjoy the long scenes depicting Buffy's martial
training? Was it the camera watching her breasts, or just me?
Maybe I like strong women? Or maybe her strength just gives me
something that, as a man, I can sympathize with.
Roger: I certainly enjoyed Buffy's fight scenes. I've seen the likes
of Steven Seagal and Jean Claude Van Damme use all of Buffy's
moves better and faster, but they just aren't exciting
anymore. I think this movie works well as an action film. The
fight scenes were fun to watch and there was enough humor to
break it up. Even with all the film's problems, I give it a
thumbs up.
Roger: The plot holes and senseless dialog were too jarring, for me. I
did enjoy the action, tho it wasn't exceptional. The humor was
mostly pretty weak. I give this film a thumbs down.
Roger: So, that's one thumb up and one thumb down for BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER. That's all for now -- the tty is closed. -- For the latest review by the Two FAT Guys, finger roger@icpsr.umich.edu.
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