DOCTOR DOLITTLE (1998) A Film Review by Ted Prigge Copyright 1999 Ted Prigge
Director: Betty Thomas Writers: Nat Mauldin and Larry Levin (based on the novel by Hugh Lofting) Starring: Eddie Murphy, Ossie Davis, Kristen Wilson, Oliver Platt, Richard Schiff, Jeffrey Tambor, Kyla Pratt, Ramon-Simone, Peter Boyle, Norm MacDonald, Chris Rock, Albert Brooks, Reni Santoni, John Leguizamo, Julie Kavner, Gary Shandling, Ellen DeGeneres, Brian Doyle-Murphy, Jenna Elfman, Gilbert Gottfried, Paul Reubens, Jonathan Lipnicki
I just can't believe there was actually a bit of controversy surrounding this film. Though aimed specifically at children (and those of childish minds), this film was awarded a "PG-13" rating for basically toilet humor, and it still grossed well over one hundred million. But upon its release, many critics were almost brutal in their dislike for the film. Nathaniel R. Atcheson, for instance, completely flew off the handle and said that this film made him want to vomit. "Feces are never funny," he proclaimed, as he completely dismissed toilet humor as an adequate artform, especially not as entertainment for kids. Roger Ebert rebuked that (though not directly). In his review, he claimed that toilet humor is not at all a bad thing, and in fact is part of the grounds for developing a sense of humor. I agree. There are no rules to comedy, and in fact anything can work as humor - that's the point of it: laughing at the shit life drops on us, so to speak. In fact, if I had not been taught at a very young age to laugh at flatuation, I would have never survived the way Elementary School and Junior High chose to torment me because of the pronunication of my last name (and they didn't even know what a "prig" was).
Ebert awarded the film a 3-star recommendation because of this. I won't even come close to taking it that far. Yes, I agree that toilet humor is a valid type of comedy, as I agree that anything and everything can be a valid type of comedy. But that doesn't mean this new adaptation of "Dr. Dolittle" is actually funny, just because it was attacked for its application of toilet humor. In fact, I think I may have grimaced once, if not twice, during the entire length of this film. The problem, I fear, is not in its tone or all that other bullshit it's been attacked for, but rather in its actual jokes. There's one thing wrong with them: they're not funny. You've heard a bad joke, right? Not the kind that offends you or anything, but instead the kind that isn't even worth acknowledgement because it's just so unhilarious. Well, think of an entire 90 minutes of jokes exactly like that, and you have the newly enhanced "Dr. Dolittle," which has nothing to do with the original Rex Harrison musical classic except that for namesake and its very basic skin-and-bones gimmick (that a man can hear animals talk).
The fact that this is a loose remake is not a problem, though: I don't care what they do with a remake, even if they decided to remake "Citizen Kane" starring Carrot Top; as long as they just made it work. This one doesn't, and it's not even in the plotting. This one deals with a John Dolittle (Eddie Murphy) who, as a kid, could hear animals talk, notably his dog/best friend (voiced by Ellen Degeneres), but lost the ability when his father (Ossie Davis) took the dog away. He's grown up to be a successful doctor, with a pretty wife (Kristen Wilson), and two nice daughters (Kyla Pratt and "The Cosby Show"'s Ramon-Simone), and has since forgotten all about his childhood ability. One day, for no real reason, animals start talking to him, first by a dog named Lucky (voiced by Norm MacDonald), who is almost hit by him when driving, and then by numerous others.
This begins to tax on his sanity, and when no one believes him, and he's making unbelievably awkward decisions to accomodate his ability (such as helping all the animals like the world's greatest veteranarian so they'll just leave him alone - yeah, that's your cure, John), he winds up in a nuthouse. Meanwhile, his hospital staff is merging with another one (in the form of Peter Boyle) and his two head assistants are divided into the conservative nice guy (underrated character actor Richard Schiff) and greedy-as-balls pseudo-villain (the great Oliver Platt), so there's a bit of forced let's-take-up-some-screen-time conflict going on other than the animals/sanity bit.
The most humorous thing about this film is the celebrities who play the animals, but not really because of the writing involved. I more or less was mildly amused throughout the film as I distracted myself from the boredom I had succumb to by playing "Guess Whose Voice That Is?" Chris Rock pops up as a guinea pig. John Leguiziamo shows up as a rat. Julie Kavner and Gary Shandling make a cameo as a pair of bickering pigeons. And (my favorite) Albert Brooks stars as a suicidal tiger. Not that their scenes are actually gut-bursting or anything. Brooks, especially, isn't given anything very interesting to talk about, even when it has the potential to be the funniest thing about the movie (and it probably is anyway). Instead, his subplot is played nearly straight, and since the idea of a sucidal tiger can probably only be played as comedy, his subplot comes off as disturbingly, well, Live-Action-Disney-esque. Never would I have thought that a side story involving a suicidal tiger would be the cherry on the top of a dramatic arc, but then again, I can be easily surprised.
The handling of the animals should have worked, though, as the foundation of the comedy in this film. There are many opportunities for jokes, and it has the right fallacy: that the animals are exactly like humans personality-wise, but have bitchings about their own kind of lives. Nothing they say is particularly humorous, though, and with Murphy playing the straight man (and nicely, I should add - though this film doesn't require old school Eddie Murphy tactics, it does show great modesty on his behalf...or, at the very least, insecurity to take a big comic risk after the result of his early-to-mid 90s career), there's really nothing to keep interest. The result is that the film is a big fat bore, and after about a half hour or so of unfunny funniness, I began checking my watch repeatedly, wondering how long I had left until I could watch something with a little more class. Say, "Dumb and Dumber."
MY RATING (out of 4): **
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