Hard Rain
As Reviewed by James Brundage
Okay, here's what I think happened with Hard Rain. The producers of Speed (Ian Brice, Mark Gordon, Allison Lyon Segon) went out after their big hit and partied a little too much, poured one too many drinks down the hatchet. They figured, hey, I've got the perfect tag line for a movie: A simple plan. An instant fortune. Just add water.
So they take this idea and put it together, just adding water (5 Million gallons of water) and a bunch of special effects, use their success with Speed to muster Christian Slater, Randy Quaid, Minnie Driver (what a drop from Good Will Hunting), and Morgan Freeman on board this ill-fated voyage. The realize at this point that they forgot a script so they get the guy who wrote Speed off from the set of HBO's From the Earth to the Moon and have him draft one up in, say, three or four days. They don't even ever look at the script and just pass it on (along with money in a crumpled envelope) to cinematographer Mikael Salamon, figuring "The last time we got a cinematographer to direct (Jan de Bont, Speed), it was a hit."
Then, with a couple more martinis, they all began the shoot. It dragged on forever because they kept revising the script and puking and all of them got sea sickness so they re-titled from The Flood to Hard Rain, put a biblical quote in front of the trailer and said: all right, we're done.
Of course by this point in time the movie was landed not only in the worst film month of the year (January), but while James Cameroon's epic Titanic is still on its way to the top ten movies of all time. But, hey, they're still drinking away so they don't notice that. At the end of it all they have a terrible movie out making next to no money and pretty soon they're going to wake up with one huge hangover. I don't want to have to foot the bill for their four year long party night.
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