X Files, The (1998)

reviewed by
James Brundage


Les X-Files
Directed by Richard Ferrando
Written by Shannon Marosi

Starring Shannon Marosi, Katie Stevens, Ping Fu, Leann Marosi, and Stephen Friday.

As Reviewed by James Brundage

Seeing as I am not an academic, I refuse to write a paper on the merits of free-access to a film online. That will not, however, stop me from writing several reviews on the subject. Once again my target is RigorMortis productions, creators of the Monty Python-esque short film L'Auto, done entirely in English. Why? Mostly this is because all of the other films I'm finding online are not registered with the IMDB, and I am clueless as how to do so. Anyone reading this review who knows how to do so, please tell me so that I may report other movies of absolutely no budget.

In the case of Les X-Files, you can't quite say it's enjoyable. You can't quite say it's good, either. But you can't quite say it's bad. Like all reviews that are truly subjective and honest, I'll present you with good points and bad points:

Unlike L'Auto, a movie with a French title done in English, Les X-Files is a movie with a French title done in French, which basically means that unless Parle vou France? Means anything special to you, forget understanding this movie. When I watched it, part of me thought: OK, this is commentary on the inexplicable and nature of Chris Carter's conspiracy theory cult hit, The writer had to do for French class. Point down: scratch higher meaning.

The humor is more tongue-in-cheek. Since you can't understand French, it's left to the physical and musical aspects to understand the film. Anyone who has seen the Season 5 finale of "The X-Files" will get the plot, so they can then appreciate the wonderful tongue-in-cheek that is shown when "Mulder" drives her car to where "Diana" was shot to the theme of "Hawaii Five-O". Come to think of it, maybe you don't.

Believe it or not, I am actually going to say that the acting was better, despite the fact that I didn't understand a word. You can actually tell looking at the faces of the talented and nearly all-Double X-chromosome cast what they're trying to get across, which various soap opera actors and actresses, despite "professional" experience, fail to do (in my humble and wise-ass opinion, they come across looking like they're trying to fart and not make a sound on "Days of our Lives"). Talking to the head of RigorMortis, he acknowledged and concurred with my viewpoint.

And, yes, people, I do think Roberto Benigni deserved Best Actor, so can the women who saw Sleepless in Seattle and think that Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan should star in every movie and should win all Academy Awards please shut up about the debate.

Another good point comes in the fact that everyone involved, including the director, had a sense of humor over the entire thing: the note that he has at the download page for this film is "Note from the Director:

Please do not e-mail for a translation of the film. It's presented in French, a language that I don't speak. The only word that I can recognize is "Une Vache," which means Cow. This film is proof that you don't have to speak a foreign language to direct a foreign language film."

Les X-Files makes me hope for the movie industry in general that the people who run companies like RigorMortis, who act in films such as Les my girlfriends.


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