Flawless (1999)

reviewed by
Jon Popick


PLANET SICK-BOY: http://www.sick-boy.com

Too many Hollywood films are based on opposites. You've got your Runaway Bride-type romantic swill where hunky guys and pretty girls hate each other, but then fall in love. And then there's your 48 Hours-type action picture where hard-edged cops and fast-talking criminals team up to catch bad guys. What we rarely see are effective, more realistic portrayals of real odd couples.

Flawless is a decent attempt to fill that niche. It's the story of a conservative ex-cop that makes an unlikely friend in his transsexual neighbor. Their relationship is predictable - they hate each other at first, but then slowly open up to one another. Despite the predictability, their screen interaction is magical, thanks to fantastic performances by two top acting talents.

The ex-cop is Walt Koontz (Robert De Niro, Analyze This), a decorated officer living in the same Bed-Stuy neighborhood that served as his beat when he was on the job. He's a well-known figurehead in the area and is on a first-name basis with people he passes on the street each day. A very friendly man, except when it comes to his drag queen neighbor.

The queen in question is Rusty Zimmerman (Philip Seymour Hoffman, Happiness), a beefy female impersonator that lives on the floor above Walt. Rusty (which I find to be a damn hysterical name for a cross-dresser) and his flamboyant friends often rehearse song and dance numbers in the building, which enrages Walt, who can hear the racket from his apartment. The two exchange a barrage of "f" words through their windows within the film's first five minutes. To further accentuate their differences, we see each standing in front of their bathroom mirrors, Walt applying Brylcreem to his graying temples and Rusty applying lipstick.

Their situation changes as a result of a late-night robbery in their building. Walt hears a gunshot, grabs his piece and tries to stop the situation, but has a stroke in the process. Partially paralyzed on his right side, Walt is too proud and embarrassed to leave his apartment, missing appointments for physical therapy, which only worsens his condition. He struggles to walk and talks like he's got a mouth full of cole slaw. Through an odd turn of events, Walt ends up taking singing lessons from Rusty in an attempt to rehabilitate his speech.

Each scene with De Niro and Hoffman is truly entertaining to watch, even though Hoffman obviously has the meatier of the two parts. He's a real scene-stealer, taking all of the good lines while De Niro is left to incoherently (literally) mumble like a member of Howard Stern's Wack Pack. De Niro's role is overshadowed and thankless and, as a result, his scenes without Hoffman seem to suck the life out of the film. To make matters worse, writer/director Joel Schumacher (8mm) continues to use the building's robbery as a continuing subplot throughout the film. It isn't needed. Flawless would have been much better if it were filmed as a two-person stage production. Its biggest flaw is to not increase the focus on its two stars.

1:50 - R for adult language and violence


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