The Blair Witch Project A review by Joe Chamberlain
Starring Heather Donahue; Michael C. Williams; Joshua Leonard; Bob Griffin & Jim King
To all of those "respected" critics out there who used words and phrases like "terrifying", "bone chilling", "the scariest movie ever" and other such expressions which lend themselves well to a movie advertisement, I have only one question. Is this the first horror movie that you have ever seen? Obviously for those of you who found it so terrifying, your only previous "horror" experiences must have come courtesy of old Scooby-Doo reruns. I guarantee you that if you had ever set foot in the horror section of your local video store you would have realized that this was far from a scary movie. But I guess for some people, jumping on the old "Blair Witch Bandwagon" was more important than writing a credible review.
This movie ranked a 3 out of 10 for me. And to be honest, none of that is for the scare factor in this movie. For those of you that have been living in a cave the past little while, here is a recap of the basic plot of the movie. The story goes that three documentary filmmakers went out into the Maryland woods looking for evidence of a local legend. This legend is a ghost known as the Blair Witch. The filmmakers went into the woods never to be heard from again. But, some time later, their equipment was found -- including their cameras and all of the footage that they shot before vanishing. This film has been compiled into the movie we now see as The Blair Witch Project.
I'll say right off the bat that this is a very cool idea. So much so, that some people actually believed that this was real documentary footage that they were watching in theaters. This is of course due, in no small part, to the incredible marketing that this movie got. The hype that surrounded this movie, specifically over the Internet, before it opened was nothing short of a phenomenon. Considering that this movie was reportedly made for something in the 40 thousand-dollar range and grossed hundreds of millions in theaters, the marketing campaign would have to be classed as an unqualified success. Sadly, like many things in life, just because there is a huge amount of hype, doesn't mean that there is actually anything good behind that hype. The Blair Witch Project does not even come close to living up to its advance word. Leaving me to wonder who exactly it was that had all these glowing things to say about the movie. Regardless, I'm glad I didn't actually pay to see this thing in a theater. I'm even happier that when I saw it on video, I didn't pay for that either.
About the only part of this movie that even got close to what I would call eerie was the final sequence in the movie. I'm certainly not about to spoil the ending, but suffice to say that if you feel the urge to abandon ship halfway through the movie you won't be missing anything. That also goes for the "newly discovered footage" which has been tacked on after the credits in the Home video versions. What a waste of about 5 minutes that was. The scariest part of the movie is the now famous close-up shot of star Heather Donahue looking into the camera and saying how scared she is. It is only scary because we get an extreme close-up view up her nostrils. There should be a law against such things.
Then we have the much-publicized camerawork that reportedly made some people physically ill in theaters. Sorry, don't buy it. Sure the angles were herky jerky, but there was nothing present that would make anyone ill who was not already suffering from an acute case of the stomach flu. I expected the lousy camera work and the black and white photography going in, so that, for the most part, didn't annoy me. But there were parts that did qualify as downright frustrating. In one scene "the witch" leaves a bundle of sticks with something inside it. Donahue's character opens it and goes into hysterics. The camera focus is so fuzzy that we can only see that whatever it is looks to be bloody, but nothing more. So we have no idea why she is so upset. The scares are like this the whole movie. The actors are running around terrified, but we, the audience, never quite get why they are so upset. They get all terrified when a pile of stones appears outside their tent. Weird, I'll grant you, but I would have been a little more unnerved if someone had been hurling them at my tent and not piling them outside it. But nobody said that these characters were that bright. They hear strange noises in the middle of the night. (Noises in the woods -- go figure.) They run off blindly into the woods and sit in the dark. Call me crazy, but if I think something might potentially attack me, I've got every light available on. I'd have the whole place lit up like Christmas tree, not sit around in the dark waiting for whatever it was to sneak up on me. This also leads to the added annoyance of having protracted sequences where the screen is totally dark with the characters whispering back and forth to each other -- very annoying. One nice touch was the fact that there was no soundtrack to this movie, which did give it more of an "authentic" feel about it. I almost wonder if a little mood music might not have improved things.
I have to give the actors credit. There was very little script involved in the making of this movie. The three were sent out into the woods where they would be left notes as to the basic that their characters were to perform. The rest is improv. And considering what they had to work with, I think that they did a hell of a good job. To be fair, considering that the three actors not only were the cast, but also doubled as the crew, the film turned out pretty well. I'm certainly not faulting the ingenious ideas or methods used in the production of this film.
What I am faulting is that this movie is billed as a horror, but it just isn't scary. Not in the least. The Blair Witch Project may make for an interesting topic for discussion in some university film class, but it sure won't make you spill your popcorn while you are jumping out of your seat. I think my brother summed it up best as the end credits started to roll. He said: They shouldn't be giving us the credits, they should be giving us an apology. Truer words were never spoken.
3/10 -- For the concept; the marketing; and the acting
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