BLOOD, GUTS, BULLETS & OCTANE (director/writer: Joe Carnahan; cinematography: John A. Jimenez; cast: Joe Carnahan (Sid French), Dan Leis (Bob Melba), Ken Rudulph (F.B.I. Agent Jared), Dan Harlan (Danny Woo), Hugh McChord (Reich), Kurt Johnson (Hillbilly Sniper), Mark S. Allen (F.B.I. Agent Franks), Kellee Benedict (F.B.I. Agent Littel), Max Ancar (F. Manzano), Mark Priolo (F. R. Priolo), Michael A. Saumure (Vernon Cash), Stew Oleson (Milt Huggins), 1998)
Reviewed by Dennis Schwartz
Another Tarantino look alike indie, filmed in thirteen days for $7,300, and it sure gets its money's worth for the effort. The filmmaker has come up with a crime-thriller spoof done at a hyper-frenetic pace that is as good if not better than most Hollywood high-budget action films of this type. Joe Carnahan is both star and director, playing a fat, sleazy, fast-talking used-car salesman named Sid French, whose partner in the Bob & Sid's Auto Emporium, is almost as sleazy as he is, but who is more practical-minded, Bob Melba (Leis). Faced with an eviction notice, their car lot located in the hinterlands of Needles, California, have only unsellable gas guzzling cars on their lot and the boys are getting desperate to get their hands on some sellable cars.
The opening scene is a contemptuous look at the salesman trying to hustle their customers. Their routine runs through every bit of disdain they have for their customers and the integrity of their profession. But it went on for too long and the fun subsided and soon became grating just like a bad commercial.
But the quick pace of the film kept things moving briskly and their use of quirky titled chapters to each little skit, kept the level of juvenile humor this film was imbued with at a bearable level. One such chapter was titled "Coldblooded Hotheads," just to give you an idea at what the film was driving at.
Their former boss and now competitor, Danny Woo (Harlan), whom they absolutely despise, asks the boys to do him a favor, the IRS is doing an audit on his business and would they say nice things about him to their investigators and he will return the favor with a favor. The boys agree, after bad-mouthing him to each other and telling about all the crooked things he has done. As they recall working for Woo, they remember him telling them that he doesn't hire salesman, he hires hit men. But they are envious of the big dealership he runs and the divorced Bob is envious of how Woo dotes on his crippled wife in such a loving manner, sadly thinking of his divorce.
Meanwhile they press their car broker to get them cars other than Gremlins and Pintos to sell, and he comes by their lot with an offer that they can't refuse but are very suspicious of. It's a vintage Pontiac Le Mans burgundy convertible that will soon be dropped off to them and they will be paid $250,000 if they allow it to sit on the lot for two days without trying to sell it or even touch it. They are told the trunk is wired to explode if they open it and there will be surveillance people watching them at all times, armed with shotguns to kill them if they try to weasel out of the deal.
The car has a history to it, as the FBI is aware that a driver of that car was killed by car jackers and they suspect a drug smuggling operation going on that is connected with the stolen car and with the recent deaths of a tribe of Indians in Ecuador, where the car was spotted. Also, butchered bodies are turning up on the road and in a garbage dump that have a connection to the stolen car.
Sid talks his partner into extorting $500,000 ransom for the car from the one's phoning them. Believing they are being set-up, as they manage to get away from the redneck shooting at them, they drive the car to a mechanic they know and have him inspect it. He tells them they are riding in a car with nitro-glycerine in it and that there is blood dripping from the trunk, but those details can't stop them from going to the meeting place where they arranged to collect their money.
The film comes to its slick ending after the last rendezvous point is arranged with the ponytailed blond psycho killer (Hugh McChord), who is the main hit man for the big boss. A number of preposterous twists come about, as the film winds its way to its final payoff, where we see suitcases filled with money being exchanged, cocaine lined up in the trunk in plastic baggies, all sorts of high-powered guns exhibited, and mysterious packets of blood. The immoral main characters end up talking about what is right and wrong with themselves and the world they live in, which adds a nice touch of absurdity to the already absurd story.
The film had energy, a ready made metaphor in the Pontiac and the used-car lot, a semi-plausible plot, some promise in the filmmaker's ability to tell a story, some choppy dialogue that could be amusing at times, and enough nerve from the actors who at times improvised and got by with it, as it looked better than a film school film, which is what it most reminded me of. It was not innovative enough to be a superior work, it needlessly displayed too much homage to other contemporary indies to make this film seem special. Yet it was engaging and at times very funny.
REVIEWED ON 11/14/99 GRADE: C+
Dennis Schwartz: "Ozus' World Movie Reviews"
http://www.sover.net/~ozus
ozus@sover.net
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