Whole Nine Yards, The (2000)

reviewed by
Scott Hunt


The Whole Nine Yards (2000)

Cast: Bruce Willis, Matthew Perry, Rosanna Arquette, Michael Clarke Duncan, Natasha Henstridge, Amanda Peet, Kevin Pollak. Writer: Mitchell Kapner. Director: Jonathan Lynn.

Review by Scott Hunt Movie Hunt: http://netdirect.net/~hunt/index.html

Rating: Near Miss  (2 out of 4 stars)

Rhythm. I kept thinking about that word as I left the theater. At it's best moments, the Whole Nine Yards has a certain rhythm. It comes from some of the one on one conversations between characters. There is a certain comic timing that reminded me of 1940's screwball comedies, like a good Tracey/Hepburn film. Those moments weren't plentiful, but they were joyful to watch.

The Whole Nine Yards centers on dentist Nicholas "Oz" Oseransky (Perry), who is sleepwalking through life married to a shrewish wife (Arquette), living a bland existance in Montreal. That all changes when Oz meets his next door neighbor, Jimmy "The Tulip" Tudeski (Willis), a former Chicago mob hitman recently released from prison for ratting out his former mob associates. Because of Tulip's kiss and tell, a mob boss, played by Pollock, wants him dead. The story careens along at a brisk clip as there are double , then triple crosses and at certain points, you don't know who is going to kill whom. Perry and Willis both play characters we've seen before, but they imbue them with so much of their persona that they gain an edge to them.

Perry is the same character he's played on TV and in previous movies: a sweet, somewhat clever guy whose unsure of what he wants in life. Willis is the same pucker-mouthed, wisecracking, king of cool that we've been seeing since his Moonlighting days. The difference this time is that Lynn has gotten the pair down to a distillation of themselves. The acting may not be a stretch for either actor, but there is a leaness to their performances that works in their favor. Perry runs the gamut of slapstick physical comedy to repeated double takes to a modest spit take, a comedic classic. He bounces through the film with whiffle ball lightness, while showing a certain restraint. He is amusing to behold.

Willis manages to turn his trademark smirk into a mysterious Mona Lisa smile, and that's the key to his performance. You think you know what Tulip is thinking, but that smirk lingers a bit long as his eyes lock uncomfortably onto another character and you sense the menace floating behind that smile.

There are other nice acting turns. Amanda Peet, as Jill, Oz's dental assistant, projects a sexy goofiness that is truly engaging. Natasha Henstridge as Tulip's wife, holds the screen with subtle emotional depth, that belies the swirl of zaniness surrounding her. Duncan, as another hitman, lights the screen up with his self satisfied smile and hulking presence. That isn't to say that everyone comes across so effectively.

It's obvious that Pollock and Arquette, as Oz's wife, were told to play their parts over the top. The problem is that they go so far over the top that they fall off the other side. Arquette adopts what is suppossed to be a french accent, but it sounded more like a blend of French, Chinese and an other-wordly language. Pollock garbles his way through an unfunny hungarian speech affectation that had me yearning for earplugs.

The Whole Nine Yards has it's moments, but it never climbs to the level of belly laughs. I found myself chuckling at certain parts and smiling in bemusement at others and there isn't a thing wrong with that. Just because it falls short of going the full 10 yards, doesn't mean it's not pleasant, very amusing film fare.


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