Author: iysmall@aol.com (Ron Small) THE BEACH (2000) Grade: C Director: Danny Boyle Screenplay: John Hodge Starring: Leonardo Di Caprio, Virginie Ledoyen, Tilda Swinton, Guillaume Canet, Robert Carlyle Remember when authors like Tom Wolfe and Norman Mailer were at the height of their popularity offering intelligent thought provoking reading to the American public. Well, I don't. You see I wasn't born. Instead, I came of age in the 90's when authors like Douglas Coupland, and Bret Easton Ellis were lauded as brilliant, and generation defining. What the hell does that say about my generation? Coupland's novels are annoyingly "hip" tales in which whiny, stylishly disenfranchised youths search for themselves. In other words, my generation. Ellis' contributions to literature have been relegated to novels in which selfish, vacant twentysomethings act selfish and vacant. In fact that word "vacant" is probably used about two hundred times (and that's a mild estimate) in Ellis' epic GLAMORAMA. It would be too easy for me to say it's the books that are vacant, but it would also be true. With their fashionable nihilism these novels are nothing more then modish propaganda aimed at an MTV-culture weaned on excess. After just two novels, Alex Garland has been described as the next great author. And yes, generation defining. So, I decided to give his first literary effort, THE BEACH, a try, and after slogging through fifty pages of bland pretension I gave up. Like the book, the movie is a cliff notes gloss on HEART OF DARKNESS, and LORD OF THE FLIES. The movie, however, ends up looking more like an episode of ROAD RULES gone horribly awry. Richard (the often-shirtless Leonardo Di Caprio) is a vacant, vapid, callous youth travelling solo through Thailand in search of the ultimate rush. He describes this to us in a detached voiceover (that recalls Edward Norton's narration in THE FIGHT CLUB) with Di Caprio's apathetic tone presumably masking deep thoughts. As directed by Danny Boyle the streets of Thailand look thrilling enough, like a melding of a rave and a flea market. When Richard retires to his dilapidated hotel room, he catches an eyeful of another hotel guest, Francoise (Virginie Ledoyen of A SINGLE GIRL) a stunning (and yes, vacant) French girl travelling with her wimpy boyfriend, Etienne (Guillaumi Canet). He is immediately awe-struck by Francoise and presumably goes to bed with a serious case of blue balls. Though sleep proves impossible; a crazy Scot only identified as Daffy (Robert Carlyle acting exactly like he did in TRAINSPOTTING) accosts Richard in his own room, blathering incoherently about some sort of paradise he calls "the beach". The guy shares a joint with Richard, so Richard lets the schizoid stay. The following day, Daffy leaves his new best friend a map to the beach, and then commits suicide. With delusions of utopian grandeur, Richard impulsively invites the French couple to come along with him in search of the paradise. Cut to a speedy montage of the three getting to know each other minus dialogue but accompanied by the redundant techno beats that Boyle places in the background of nearly every scene. Once they reach the much-lauded island (and after escaping armed guards and jumping from a waterfall) the trio stumbles upon a community of attractive travelers, who have turned the island into their own haven. Richard and his companions are welcomed, and they choose to stay, indefinitely. Which is completely understandable: The island is sublime, encompassed by mountainous granulated rock, a tropical blue-tinted ocean, cretaceous sand, and occupants that look like they've stepped out of a Calvin Klein catalogue. In fact the entire movie looks like a postmodern Calvin Klein add. Everything is dazzling to gaze upon, from the flowing waterfalls, to the bronze sunsets. (If Danny Boyle's career ever hits hard times he'd have no problem getting work as a travelogue director). Back to the story: For no discernable reason, Richard woos Francoise away from Etiene, and they make love underwater amid tiny bubbles made to look like aquatic fireworks. Etiene discovers the little indiscretion, yells a bit, and then it's abruptly forgotten. Actually the character of Etiene remains forgotten for the duration of THE BEACH. He has no reason to exist other than to get shat on by nearly everyone. It made me wonder why screenwriter John Hodge simply didn't excise him completely. Then Leo could have an unfettered romance, and keep all his female fans happy. As it is, when Richard and Francoise screw over Etiene the way they do, their characters become completely unlikable for no purpose. But either way, I could care less about both Etiene and Francoise. They aren't distinct characters, only foil for the plot, and Etiene isn't even that. The actor, Guillaumi Canet, might as well be a glorified extra. Leyoden (who was effective in expressive French roles) is so damn wooden she's actually upstaged by her French accent. Not that she's required to do anything strenuous; all she has to do is look stunning (and how much effort does that take) and act seductive. None of the other characters amount to anything more than half-sentence descriptions; there is the cook who doesn't like fish, the carpenter who doesn't like Richard, and the stoners who really like weed. As for Di Caprio, the kid is in virtually every scene yet he's as much a sketched out character as any one else. In the opening, his narration drones: "My name is Richard, and that is all you need to know". It looks like the filmmakers agreed with him. Alas the story does attempt to get a little heady on us. It turns the tables on its BLUE LAGOON-like harmony, when a shark attacks two of the island inhabitants. The self-appointed leader of the community, Sal (a cold Tilda Swinton) chooses not to send for help. The island is a secret and she will go to great lengths to keep it that way. This is where the humans-as-savages LORD OF THE FLIES\HEART OF DARKNESS thing comes in. Further delving into that territory, Richard becomes one with nature, tying a bandana around his forehead, and frantically running through the jungle while growling, and munching on bugs. No, I really mean it. He begins to hear reverberations in his head, like war flash backs ("Delta 19er!"), but those flashbacks really stem from all the video games and movies that Richard has consumed (I don't think there's a support group for that). He's like a Vietnam vet who never even went to Vietnam or a trauma victim with no damn trauma. The scene had me giggling with joy, and I know that wasn't the point. But when Di Caprio leaps around looking more like a pissed off BACKSTREET BOY than Rambo I challenge anyone not to let out a little giggle. Though I must say God bless him. Leo sure puts his all into this role, but he might as well be starring in SHE'S ALL THAT 2. The film tries to reach for nutso nirvana, turning into a Gen-X war fantasy but it feels more like a desperate attempt at some artistic credibility. Maybe Boyle and his crew will get it right next time. For now, all I can say about THE BEACH is that it looks as good as it's star, and maybe that will be enough for all those fourteen year old girls. http://www.geocities.com/incongruity98 (Ron's Movie Reviews)
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