THE WHOLE NINE YARDS **1/2 (out of four stars) A review by Jamey Hughton
Starring-Matthew Perry, Bruce Willis, Rosanna Arquette, Michael Clarke Duncan, Natasha Henstridge, Amanda Peet and Kevin Pollak Director-Johnathan Lynn Canadian Rating-14A
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In `The Whole Nine Yards', everyone is eager to whack someone else, whether the incentive is marital difficulties or business. For Jimmy `The Tulip' Tudeski (Bruce Willis), a hitman formerly associated with the notorious Gogalack crime family in Chicago, it's strictly business. After supplying the FBI with evidence against the Gogalack family and serving his 5-year prison term, The Tulip has relocated to Montreal, Quebec to hide out. His new neighbor, the `poor dentist' Nick Oseransky (Matthew Perry), recognizes his mug immediately because he once maintained a dental practice in the Windy City. And so begins `The Whole Nine Yards', a surprisingly enjoyable farce that jettisons some of its comedic appeal in favor of crafting a rather convoluted storyline.
For Matthew Perry, the transition from `Friends' to the big screen has been occupied with unpleasant turbulence. Contrary to most, I somewhat enjoyed his two critically battered romantic vehicles `Fools Rush In' and `Three to Tango'.... but despite his perceptible charm and gifted comic timing, the actor has carried with him a wretched box office curse in whatever film he inhabits. Hopefully, `The Whole Nine Yards' will put an end to that mean streak. After all, the movie stars Mr. Box Office himself, Bruce Willis - whose career seems to have been jump-started once again by the little supernatural thriller that could (`The Sixth Sense'). Tack on a talented supporting cast willing to experiment with an accent or two, and the result is a fairly perky and energetic comic stew containing just enough clever zeal and enthusiasm to fill a 2-hour gap quite entertainingly.
The plot will sound complicated to most, but once you get a taste of `The Whole Nine Yards' first-hand, everything will level out in a straightforward fashion. Once Tudeski moves in, Oseransky (or `Oz') gets overwrought with panic. His miserly Canadian wife Sophie (Rosanna Arquette), who has made the union of marriage hell for Oz, persuades him to travel to Chicago and inform the Gogalack family of Tudeski's whereabouts (the method of persuasion being that she will grant him a divorce). But this is only the start of the intricate shenanigans, as Jimmy's lovely wife Cynthia (Natasha Henstridge), Nick's bubbly receptionist Jill (Amanda Peet) and behemoth underling Frankie Figs (Michael Clarke Duncan) all get involved in the fiasco. The plot is so convoluted that it causes you to speculate about what director Jonathan Lynn's primary concerns were. If the layout of `The Whole Nine Yards' was a race track, the shady mobster/hitman portion of the plot would have lapped the humor five times over.
Fortunately, the film still has its laughs. Lynn, who has done good (`My Cousin Vinny') and not-so-good (`Sgt. Bilko'), keeps the pace churning at a consistent momentum, and his slick approach leaves little margin for error. Although `The Whole Nine Yards' deals with somber dealings like murder and double-crosses, most of the film has a light, puckery taste to it. This agreeable flavor is largely due to the beaming supporting cast - particularly Amanda Peet, whose terrific comic performance lends a sense of illumination to every scene she's in. Meanwhile, Henstridge (the babalicious alien from `Species') shows us her surprising competence with giving a strong serious performance, and Duncan (the Oscar-nominated actor from `The Green Mile') occupies the character of Frankie Figs like few others could. The only general exception is Rosanna Arquette, who is mainly just shill and grating with the character of Sophie, and her highly inconsistent `Canadian' accent reveals that she maybe forgot to do any research whatsoever.
The most interesting accent of the show belongs to the funny Kevin Pollak, playing imposing (and rather unintelligent) mob boss Yanni Gogalack, who introduces Cynthia as `Yimmy's vife'. In a way similar to Yanni's verbal clumsiness, `The Whole Nine Yards' has its priorities in a tangle. The script straddles two separate genres and sometimes reveals a gaping hole of incompetence. The film itself is a bit off-centered, but Matthew Perry and Bruce Willis know every nook and cranny of their characters, and their one-two punch of forceful tough guy and suburban doofus helps add to the entertainment value of the film. `The Whole Nine Yards' is not as fulfilling as the title may suggest, but as a comedy, it is still more leisurely than most.
(C) 2000, Jamey Hughton
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