'3 Black Chicks Review...'
Reindeer Games (2000) Rated R; running time 105 minutes Genre: Action Adventure IMDB site: http://us.imdb.com/Details?0184858 Official site: http://www.dimensionfilms.com/ Written by: Ehren Kruger Directed by: John Frankenheimer Starring: Ben Affleck, Charlize Theron, Gary Sinise, Dennis Farina, James Frain, Clarence Williams III
Review Copyright Rose Cooper, 2000 Review URL: http://www.3blackchicks.com/bamsreindeer.html
Dogma was weird. Magnolia was weird. Being John Malkovich was most def weird.
Reindeer Games is On Drugs.
The Story (WARNING: some spoilers contained below): In what must have been a good idea to somebody down the line (though lord only knows why), Ben Affleck stars as Rudy [Get it? "Rudy", as in "Rudolph"...you know, on the "Reindeer Games" theme? Yah, that's what I said, too.], newly released from prison after doing time for car theft. While in prison, Rudy bunked with Nick (James Frain), who was in a serious pen-pal relationship with Ashley (Charlize Theron), a woman he--and Rudy--obsessed over. Nick was also due to be released at the same time as Rudy, until he was attacked by a con who was after Rudy; when Rudy got out, he assumed Nick's identity so he could get with Ashley. But Ashley's brother Gabriel (Gary Sinise) had plans for "Nick": he needed Nick to set up a heist of the casino owned by James Banks (Dennis Farina)--and Gabriel's not the type to take "no" for an answer...
The Upshot: I know what you're thinking. "Self," I hear you saying to yourself, "just what's got that Chick up in arms about that description, enough for her to say 'Reindeer Games is On Drugs'?" Well, I'll tell ya: the way this story is told by writer Ehren Kruger and director John Frankenheimer, has got to be the most preposterous load of baloney I've ever seen--and it got worse as the movie got longer. I sat there, stunned, unable to believe that they really wanted us to run with this one. I couldn't play along; my Disbelief was Suspended so high, it developed a nosebleed. And what's more: from the stunned looks on the faces of most of the actors, especially Ben Affleck and Charlize Theron, I find it hard to believe that they believed it, either.
I'll be kind and blame it on the writer and director, giving the actors the benefit of the doubt. After all, it's not Affleck's fault that his character seemed so dunderheaded throughout most of the movie [movie character rule number one: if given the chance to escape your kidnappers and you come back for no obvious reason, you deserve to be chained to your bed], resorting to lame humor that fell completely flat during the casino scenes. I bet Affleck is regretting having raised such a stink about being billed as the star of "Boiler Room" right about now; Ben, old boy, maybe you should just count the money and run.
Affleck got off easy compared to the rest of the cast. Sinise, so good in even a quick cameo in The Green Mile, is as wasted here as poor Dennis Farina is--though at least Sinise actually got to act during his screen time. I have no idea what it was that Farina was doing; alas, it's a long way from his heyday in TV's "Crime Story" to this mess. And speaking of TV heydays, Clarence Williams III--"Linc" in "Mod Squad" from back in the day--was so exchangeable with The Bad Indian and The Bad White Guy sidekicks, I never noticed they had individual names.
As for Ms. Theron, my heart broke, seeing her so badly miscast (not to mention, acting so badly) here after her good performance in "The Cider House Rules" last year. I have no doubt that Sinise, as talented as he is, can bounce back from this bad idea; I can only hope the same for Theron (Affleck, on the other hand, will probably do just fine. There's something to be said for being Flava Of The Month, and Affleck, Matt Damon, and Leo DiCapitated seem to have that market cornered pretty well).
It's hard to go into detail about exactly what ticked me off so about this flick, without giving away "key" scenes, so I won't--except to say that the "twist" at the end goes down in my book as the worst excuse for a "reason why it all happened" that I've seen in a long time. Suffice it to say that if you go see it, when you hear yourself mumbling "what the hell?" over and over again, you'll know what I mean.
The "Black Factor" [ObDisclaimer: We Are Not A Monolith]: I wasn't gonna bother with the BF for this flick--Clarence Williams III having such a nothing part in this that it didn't much matter--but on second thought, there was one thing that I actually got half a chuckle over. In a blink-and-you'll-miss-it moment, Isaac Hayes (on leave from "South Park" perhaps?) shows up as a prisoner grossed out by the..."protein" supplement in his jello. My, Chef, how the mighty have fallen...
Bammer's Bottom Line: Note to Movie Executives: please please a thousand times please, institute a No Hallucinogens Allowed policy during your storyboard brainstorming meetings with these wacko writers and directors. Movie viewers everywhere will thank you.
"Reindeer Games" (rating: redlight): ...This is your writer/director On Drugs. Any questions?
3 Black Chicks...Movie Reviews With Flava! /~\ Rose "Bams" Cooper /','\ 3BlackChicks Enterprises /','`'\ Copyright Rose Cooper, 2000 /',',','/`, EMAIL: bams@3blackchicks.com ICQ: 7760005 `~-._'c / http://www.3blackchicks.com/ `\ ( http://www.dealpilot.com/?partner=1987 /====\
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