Drowning Mona (2000) Reviewed by Eugene Novikov http://www.ultimate-movie.com/ Member: Online Film Critics Society
Starring Bette Midler, Casey Affleck, Danny DeVito, Jamie Lee Curtis, Neve Campbell, William Fichtner, Marcus Thomas. Directed by Nick Gomez. Rated PG-13.
Drowning Mona is a weak, underrealized, inconsistent comedy that has enough little throwaway gags to keep us interested but not much more to sustain our constant involvement. It's dark, often meanspirited but it's laughs don't originate in its pitch-black tone. Instead, the few moments here worth savoring are the goofier, more light-hearted ones. Does that make the movie a failure? That depends on your tastes.
The film opens with a scruffy-looking Bette Midler getting out of her trailer to go somewhere. She realizes she doesn't have keys to the right car, so she is forced to take her son's. As she's riding along she comes to a hairpin turn that, if not maneuvered around correctly, can lead to a car plunging into a lake. She slams the breaks, but they don't work. Down, down to a watery grave.
Via flashbacks we find out that Midler's character, whose name was Mona Dearly, was not a well-liked lady. She was, in fact, a violent bitch who delighted in hitting people with frying pans and other blunt objects when they did the slightest thing to piss her off. This leaves the town detective (Danny DeVito) with a problem: who cut Mona Dearly's breaks? Everyone, it seems, had a motive. Was it Mona's husband (William Fichtner)? Her idiot son (Marcus Thomas)? A mild-mannered (or is he) young enterpeneur who's had his share of encounters with Mona (Casey Affleck)? Or could it be Mona's husband's mistress (Jamie Lee Curtis)? All of the above?
The problem with Drowning Mona is that it's consistently unfunny. Is it offbeat? Yes. Entertaining? Sometimes. But only on a few occasions does it inspire as much as hearty chuckles. The movie is dark, yes, being as it deals with the murder of a woman whom everyone wanted dead, but its mood rarely translates into laughs.
That being said, rookie screenwriter Peter Steinfeld has a couple moments where he shines. These are throwaways; they don't make the movie, but at least they assure that Drowning Mona is worth a rental. Example: two policemen approach a suicidal man. He desperately yells "Don't come any closer, sheriff!" referring to DeVito. The policeman with him yells "No! He's not a sheriff!" That was one of the only times I laughed with this movie rather than at it.
Considering the big name cast, the performances here are, to my great shock, merely serviceable. Bette Midler is good at playing a bitch, but she has so little actual screentime she isn't on enough to really make a difference. Casey Affleck is annoying as hell, using a shrill, high- pitched voice for some reason I don't understand. Neve Campbell isn't the brightest light bulb when it comes to satire and she makes it quite evident with her dull, one-sided performance. The one actor who rises above the crowd is William Fichtner, who's quite good at playing a slimy, unsympathetic bastard. And since that's what all of the characters sans, maybe, DeVito's are supposed to be, I wish all the actors involved in this project were as good as Fichtner at what the script asked them to do.
It's hard to hate Drowning Mona. Some of it is done well, especially the uncharacteristically cheery musical score that accompanies some of the proceedings. But there is not enough here. Not enough laughs, not enough plot, not enough good performances. This is an interesting failure, but a failure all the same.
Grade: C
©2000 Eugene Novikov
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