THE REPLACEMENTS (Warner Bros.) Starring: Keanu Reeves, Gene Hackman, Orlando Jones, Jon Favreau, Brooke Langton, Rhys Ifans, Brett Cullen, Jack Warden, Ace Yonamine. Screenplay: Vince McKewin. Producer: Dylan Sellers. Director: Howard Deutch. MPAA Rating: PG-13 (profanity, adult themes, violence) Running Time: 116 minutes. Reviewed by Scott Renshaw.
If the theme of THE REPLACEMENTS -- and I use the word "theme" so loosely that it may fall off at any moment -- is that certain overpaid entertainers have grown complacent and lazy and that audiences prefer seeing genuine effort, there's more than a teensy bit of irony in it. BAD NEWS BEARS-style comedies have been the preferred brand of sports film since ... well, since THE BAD NEWS BEARS. A lovable loser/band of lovable losers eventually rallies around his/her/its underdog status and surmounts impossible odds to emerge victorious -- what tale could be more fundamentally American?
Of course, the "work ethic" is supposed to be fundamentally American, too, but you'd never know it from the sort of sleepwalking screenwriting in THE REPLACEMENTS. Inspired by the 1987 NFL players' strike and the teams' subsequent hiring of replacement players, the story is set in a fictional professional football league about to experience its own work stoppage. The owners, including Washington Sentinels owner Ed O'Neil (Jack Warden), have decided to play with replacements, and O'Neil hands the job of putting together his makeshift team to ex-coach Jimmy McGinty (Gene Hackman). McGinty has plenty of players in mind, but the key to his team is Shane Falco (Keanu Reeves), a former college All-American quarterback now scraping barnacles off of fishing boats. Reluctantly, Falco joins the Sentinels, and tries to rally his rag-tag bunch to a playoff spot.
Three guesses whether they make it, and the first two don't count, but never mind that. Never mind too that THE REPLACEMENTS doesn't exactly treat the labor dispute with any complexity (owners and striking players bad, cheerleaders and replacement players good). And never mind even that the music supervisor appears to have been stuck in a time warp in which nothing recorded after 1985 exists. Movies like THE REPLACEMENTS have always been about the hijinks of the players, both on and off the field; the predictability of the formula has been part of its appeal. There are a some fun characterizations -- Jon Favreau as an unhinged SWAT cop-turned-middle linebacker, Rhys Ifans as chain-smoking Welsh soccer player-turned-placekicker Nigel -- and some amusing confrontations with the striking players. The losers get better, the bad guys get their comeuppance, there are some decent chuckles along the way, everyone applauds. No muss, no fuss.
And no common sense. For a fairly simple comedy, THE REPLACEMENTS is full of baffling plot points. What undefined cheerleader sympathy strike required head cheerleader-and-Keanu-romantic-interest-in-waiting Annabelle (Brooke Langton) to put together a new group made up of exotic dancers? Why was it necessary to bring in the vaguely blackballed McGinty to lead the replacement team? Why do people keep referring to players on opposing teams as All-Pros when the regular players are supposed to be on strike? Why does a team that has been practicing together for less than a week appear to be running complicated passing plays on every down? Even ignoring the most obvious question of all -- why cast Keanu Reeves as the lead in a comedy -- THE REPLACEMENTS appears to have been constructed with no thought but getting to the big ending, when everyone can applaud for the triumphant underdog.
What it comes down to, really, is laziness. Veteran hack comedy director Howard Deutch (GRUMPIER OLD MEN, THE ODD COUPLE II) is a button-pusher, knowing how to get the most obvious laughs out of the most obvious situations at the most obvious times. Mining the potential from their premise appears way beyond the capacity of Deutch and screenwriter Vince McKewin. For a "legendary" coach, McGinty sure ignores every possible creative use of his team's unique abilities. How about a running play behind sumo tackle Jumbo (Ace Yonamine)? Handing a kickoff return to speedster receiver Clifford Franklin (Orlando Jones)? Quick-kicking with the thunder-footed Nigel to get good field position? It doesn't take a tactical gridiron genius to realize that the makers of THE REPLACEMENTS just don't care. The concept is pre-sold, the fans are in the seats, and the overpaid entertainers couldn't care less about giving their all for the people ultimately paying their salaries. Is anyone interested in making a movie about replacement film-makers?
On the Renshaw scale of 0 to 10 sympathy strikes: 4.
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