"Dungeons" and Dragging by Homer Yen (c) 2000
Many years ago, my friends and I would meet every other Saturday afternoon and embark on imaginary quests. In our minds, we created and entered a mythical realm that held treasures waiting to be discovered, perils waiting to be faced, and magic spells waiting to be unleashed. Our group of adventurers included fighters that eagerly charged into battle, mages that coruscated the sky with magic missiles and balls of lightning, clerics that provided healing powers, and thieves that were useful in disarming traps and picking locks. Overseen by an emcee that thrust us into dangerous situations, armed with a stack of paper that provided information about our abilities, and equipped with a myriad of strangely shaped dice that could spell fortune or disaster, we giddily lost ourselves for several hours in the neo-medieval world of Dungeons & Dragons.
Much of the action and skullduggery that could have only been imagined those Saturday afternoons have been conjured up adequately in this live-action film based on the popular role-playing game. The story tells about the struggle between young, embattled Empress Savina (Thora Birch) and the power-mad Profion (Jeremy Irons), an evil mage who seeks to incite a revolt. Savina receives help from some unlikely sources including two bumbling thieves, an apprentice mage, a battle axe-wielding dwarf, and a dark-skinned elf. They find danger at every turn as they negotiate dungeons, trapped mazes, and a dragon's lair where they seek an artifact that can help them defeat Profion.
The landscape, the various humanoid races, and the monsters are all nicely envisioned, but the movie suffers terribly from stilted acting and a screenplay that sacrifices what could have been a rousing adventure of might and magic for cartoonish mayhem. Jeremy Irons is frequently incomprehensible as the snarling mage. Thora Birch lacks passion as the benevolent leader. And the others players seem like they're from various defunct WB television shows. They are much too young to be able to succeed in their tasks, but are obviously cast in order to appeal to a younger audience.
With its popularity and built-in fan base, a live-action film seemed like a no-brainer. However, it took 10 long years before a suitable script and the necessary financing (budgeted at about $40+ million) could be put together. And bringing the world of D&D to life was not easy. Only recently, the special effects technology was adequate enough to successfully capture the enchanted look that an ersatz Paladin like myself could appreciate. Indeed, the visuals are quite impressive, making this film look far more expensive than its purported price tag. In its climactic scene, for example, there is a tremendous battle that showcases dozens of flying dragons and spellcasting mages. Yet while this film seems long overdue, it also feels like it has arrived too late. My dice now sit in the dusty corner of some seldom-used closet and my character sheets have yellowed with age. Only teens, fans of Baldur's Gate, and Dungeon-heads will find this tolerable.
Grade: C-
S: 1 out of 3 L: 0 out of 3 V: 1 out of 3
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