DUNGEONS & DRAGONS A film review by Steve Rhodes Copyright 2000 Steve Rhodes RATING (0 TO ****): 1/2
Jeremy Irons (Academy Award-winner for REVERSAL OF FORTUNE), we didn't know you had it in you. When you go slumming, as you do in Courtney Solomon's DUNGEONS & DRAGONS, your acting is not just merely awful but a major league stinkeroo.
Assuming you're not destitute and it isn't your evil twin in the picture, the only possible explanation left is that your work in the movie is one big inside joke. With your snarls and exaggerations, you chew up the scenery with crude abandon. You must hope that any film this bad has to become a cult classic, and that, if it does, your part in it will eventually be seen as a huge spoof. Someday you can tell the movie magazines that you intentionally tried to see just how terrible you could be. Watching you is such an embarrassment that I hope your strategy proves correct. I refuse to assume that you acted this pathetically unless it was on purpose.
To be fair, the performance by Thora Birch (Academy Award nominee for AMERICAN BEAUTY) is not much better. Looking like a little girl playing dress up, she delivers her lines with such awkwardness that she would be rejected for a community theater production.
The minimal plot, set in medieval times, involves the control of dragons and the saving of the empire. With ugly and clunky special effects, the picture is no joy to watch.
"Please help me!" asks a character with iridescent blue lipstick played by Bruce Payne. He appears to want to be put out of his misery. Where is the bubonic plague when you need it? I wanted them all to die and the sooner, the better.
DUNGEONS & DRAGONS runs a long 1:45. It is rated PG-13 for fantasy action violence and would be acceptable for kids around 11 and up.
My son Jeffrey, age 11, and some of his classmates who saw the film with him really liked it. They thought it started slow, but the maze and the fighting scenes were awesome and the special effects were cool. Their ratings were pretty high: **** (Jeffrey, Steven, Kyle and Sam), *** 1/2 (Alan), *** (Nick) and ** 1/2 (John).
Email: Steve.Rhodes@InternetReviews.com Web: http://www.InternetReviews.com
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