HAUNTED CASTLE A film review by Annette Cardwell Copyright 2001 filmcritic.com
More freaky and odd than scary, the latest 3D IMAX film, Haunted Castle, is not what it sounds like. Don't expect a funhouse-style ride through a house of horrors. Instead, get ready for an outrageously bad plot filled with ear-piercingly bad music -- yikes, there's even a really lame live band sequence at the end -- and laughable dialogue. But, who's really going to see a 3D IMAX film for a great storyline and acting?
The best reason to see most IMAX films, especially the 3D variety, is to ooh and ahh at the giant screen antics. Through the clouded lenses of the bulky IMAX visor, tree limbs will jut out into your face, demons will fly straight into your body, and you'll even feel like you're peering precariously over the edge of the castle's gargoyle-dotted rooftop. Even if the film's CG animation is obvious from the beginning, it comes off looking much like an elaborate video game, and is far less bothersome than some of the film's most ridiculous element: story.
The weak tale begins with our struggling musician hero venturing to a spooky castle to collect on his inheritance from his famous rock star mother. He soon learns that mom had sold her soul to the devil, and now "Mr. D" -- as he's called here -- wants to sign the kid up for mom's same deal. The movie takes us with him on his tour of Hell's more musical realms. But, will our boy sign on the fiery dotted line?
Of course, none of this matters. The half-witted story will give you a headache if you even pay attention to it, and the voice acting is just absurd. So don't give it a second thought, and just enjoy the cool visuals. But, Haunted Castle isn't as suitable for the whole family as most IMAX films are, since some of the film's images are pretty gruesome and even more harsh being viewed in 3D -- such as a that of a corpse being electrocuted or grisly bodies suffering in Purgatory. In fact, there was talk that IMAX was not sure whether to release this movie, since it doesn't cater to an all-age audience. As a real horror flick might say: Be warned... if you're bringing a small child to the movies with you.
Rating: **
|------------------------------|
\ ***** Perfection \
\ **** Good, memorable film \
\ *** Average, hits and misses \
\ ** Sub-par on many levels \
\ * Unquestionably awful \
|------------------------------|
MPAA Rating: PG-13
Director: Ben Stassen Producer: Charlotte Huggins, Caroline Van Iseghem Writer: Ben Stassen Starring: Jasper Steverlinck, Kyoko Baertsoen, Harry Shearer
http://209.250.99.211/hauntedcastle/
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