THE UGLY KID A film review by Steve Rhodes Copyright 2001 Steve Rhodes RATING (0 TO ****): *
Cricket. That's what they call Lloyd in Hector Barron's THE UGLY KID. With no chin, a large mouth, big eyes and geeky glasses, Lloyd (Todd Bosley) is an awkward kid who tries to make friends by being the class clown. Even with candy bribes to his whole 6th grade class, he still remains decidedly unpopular. He gets no valentines, no dances and no birthday party guests.
Loving Tracy, the prettiest girl in school, Lloyd is, of course, spurned while a more deserving candidate casts her eyes on him. On the other hand, a good kid and a nice looking boy, Troy (Brendon Ryan Barrett), becomes his best and only friend. Lloyd could learn a thing or two from his 8-year-old brother, Nathan, a self-proclaimed "chick magnet," whose "honeys" call him up regularly on the phone.
The teachers in Lloyd's junior high school are various degrees of idiots. Mrs. Crub, the worst of the bunch, ridicules her pupils by saying things like, "You're here to learn. Ignorance isn't something to be proud of!" She is of the opinion that the kids would learn more if the school weren't so much fun. Most of the acting, especially by the adults, is way below the level found in just about any television series on the Disney channel. Bosley tries hard to be sympathetically obnoxious but ends up being just obnoxious instead.
Lloyd's big dream is to marry Tracy. He sees them together having an intimate candlelight dinner of Lucky Charms with chilled milk served out of a champagne bottle. He would also like to try some "tongue hockey" on her, which is when the boy sticks his tongue far enough down the girl's mouth to "ring her bell."
Lloyd's one claim to fame is that he knows a little magic, which he learns from the local magic store owner (Tom Arnold in a cameo). Our family was wishing that Lloyd would make the whole movie disappear. And the sooner the better.
THE UGLY KID runs 1:18. It is rated PG for language and playground violence and would be acceptable for most kids.
My son Jeffrey, almost 12, who is a 6th grader just like Lloyd, thought the movie was absolutely terrible. He gave it 1/2 of a star. Only a nice ending scene kept him from giving it zero. He said that the acting and the plot were dull, boring and stupid and that there weren't any funny or exciting parts anywhere in the picture.
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