What's the Worst That Could Happen? (2001)

reviewed by
Bob Bloom


What's the Worst That Could Happen (2001) 1 star out of 4. Starring Martin Lawrence, Danny DeVito, John Leguizamo, Glenne Headly, Carmen Ejogo, Bernie Mac, Larry Miller, Nora Dunn, Richard Schiff, William Fichtner and Ana Gasteyer. Screenplay by Matthew Chapman. Based upon the novel by Donald E. Westlake. Music by Tyler Bates. Directed by Sam Weisman. Rated PG-13.

Did the studio brain trust who approved a title such as Whatís the Worst That Could Happen? pause to consider the potential fun critics could have playing off those words if they disliked the film?

 For example:
 Whatís the worst that could happen?

You can be forced to sit through this nonsense a second time.

 Whatís the worst that could happen?
 The studio can announce a sequel.
 Whatís the worst that could happen?

You can find yourself locked in a theater holding a Martin Lawrence film festival.

 Whatís the worst that could happen?

The directorís cut on DVD could include an extra 30 minutes of footage.

 Well, you get the idea.

Whatís the Worst That Could Happen is a lame, cynical movie trying to pass itself off as a comedy caper. The movie has its moments, but you could do the Sunday New York Times crossword puzzle between them.

Itís difficult enjoying a movie in which most of the characters are thieves and crooks. Itís even harder to garner sympathy for people who spend their lives thumbing their noses at the law.

Of course you can say actors such as James Cagney and Humphrey Bogart made careers playing such characters. The difference is the agents of law and order generally prevailed, and the Cagneys and Bogarts usually paid the ultimate price in the final reel.

Whatís the Worst That Could Happen revolves around Kevin Caffery (Lawrence), a high-class thief, and his battle with corrupt media tycoon Max Fairbanks (Danny DeVito) to retrieve a ring Fairbanks took from Caffery when the latter was caught burglarizing the mogulís summer home.

The ring was given to Kevin by his girlfriend, Amber (Carmen Ejogo).

Even taking into consideration that this feature is a comedy, the plotting and storyline is preposterous. Though captured early in the film in Fairbanksí mansion, Kevin escapes. Yet the police arenít looking for him and he walks around in broad daylight without fear of seizure.

Amber falls in love with Kevin because he steals back a painting she was forced to sell. Even when he admits to her that he is crook, she is unfazed. Why? Because, as she tells him, she had dated lawyers, so dating a thief shouldnít be much different.

In some ways the film is offensive. William Fichtner plays a police detective who is a stereotyped gay directly from some homophobicís handbook. He minces, swishes, carries a cane, dresses all in white, and owns three cute little doggies to whom he speaks in baby talk.

The mush-mouthed Lawrence is not credible as a high-classed thief. He lacks the sophistication and suaveness called for in the part.

DeVito merely seems to be reprising a role he has played many times before ó most notably in Ruthless People ó that of the overbearing, crooked tycoon who believes his wealth puts him above the law.

A strong supporting cast, including John Leguizamo, Glenne Headley, Bernie Mac, Richard Schiff, Larry Miller, Nora Dunn and Ana Gasteyer are wasted in this weak effort.

Whatís the worst that could happen? That this movie actually draws an audience and takes up screen space that could be used for more deserving fare.

Bob Bloom is the film critic at the Journal and Courier in Lafayette, IN. He can be reached by e-mail at bloom@journal-courier.com or at bobbloom@iquest.net. Other reviews by Bloom can be found at www.jconline.com by clicking on golafayette. Bloom's reviews also can be found on the Web at the Internet Movie Database site: http://www.imdb.com/M/reviews_by?Bob+Bloom


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