More Winter Film Reviews
A film review by Michael John Legeros
Copyright 1995 Michael John Legeros
Contents ========
BOYS ON THE SIDE HIGHLANDER III IMMORTAL BELOVED IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS MURDER IN THE FIRST THE JERKY BOYS RED TO LIVE
BOYS ON THE SIDE Rated "R" / 117 min. ================
Road trip! On their way to L.A., driving companions Whoopi Goldberg and Mary Louise-Parker stop to pick up a friend (Drey Barrymore) in Pittsburg. She's just ko-ed her abusive husband with a baseball bat and needs to both get away and stay away. So they head out to the highway, ready to play tunes and paint toenails. Sound familiar?
Call it another "chick flick," but this logical successor to THELMA AND LOUISE delivers an intriguing message about the price of freedom. From the POV of screenwriter Don Roos, the cost of empowerment includes pregnancy, AIDS, and a six-month jail sentence. Directed by Herbert Ross (STEEL MAGNOLIAS).
Grade: B-
HIGHLANDER III Rated "R" / 109 min. ==============
As an old science-fiction geek from long, long ago, I thought I'd find at least *something* to enjoy in the doomed HIGHLANDER III. Wrong. This is direct-to-video fare at it's finest, with plotting that would shame even the cheapest comic book. Mario Van Peebles (!) plays the sword-wielding villain, who returns from a 400-year imprisonment to battle Christopher Lambert and his mysterious accent.
There should've been only one.
Grade: F
IMMORTAL BELOVED Rated "R" / 121 min. ================
AMADEUS it ain't. Gary Oldman is certainly right for the role of Ludwig van Beethoven. He can brawl like the best rock star and brood like the most serious composer. He even plays his own piano, which, in this film, is no small feat. Too bad the CITIZEN KANE-like structure of writer/director Bernard Roses's biography-as-a-mystery never uncovers anything interesting. Great soundtrack, though, if you don't mind the conspicuous absence of period instruments.
Ode to joy indeed.
Grade: C+
IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS Rated "R" / 108 min. =======================
Horror helmer John Carpenter is behind this painfully slow story of a hard-boiled insurance investigator (Sam Neill) trying to track down a missing Stephen King-sort (Jurgen Prochnow). The I.I. believes the disappearance to be a publicity stunt, until he ends up trapped in the author's fictional town.
The premise is great, but Carpenter's pacing is all wrong. He doesn't even frame the story very well. Neill does what he can with a very unappealing character. He's no fun to watch. A better mystery might be to figure out how John Glover, David Warner, and Charleton Heston (!) were corralled into this mess.
Grade: C-
THE JERKY BOYS Rated "R" / 82 min. ==============
They are a pair of pranksters from Queens who specialize in abusive, obscene phone calls. Their strengths are their voices, which help breath to life such unforgettable characters as the irate Frank Rizzo and the hapless Sal Rosenberg. What the Jerky Boys are *not* are actors, and this movie makes the mistake of trying treat them as same.
A truly innovative script would've kept the Boys (Johnny Brennan and Kamal) hidden off-screen for the entire film. This slop reveals their identities within the first five minutes--a mistake from which the film never recovers. Sure, the two recreate some of their better-known bits to amusing effect, but the bulk of the film is just one, long chase scene. And what are William Hickey, Alan Arkin, Ozzy Osbourne, and Tom Jones doing here?
Executive produced by Tony Danza and Emilio Estevez (!).
Grade: D+
MURDER IN THE FIRST Rated "R" / 130 min. ===================
This overdirected courtroom drama would like to be as exciting as A FEW GOOD MEN, but director Marc Rocco doesn't have enough sense to keep his camera still during the best parts. He swirls and twirls through every scene as if he were filming a wrestling match. Both Kevin Bacon and Gary Oldman (again!) are quite good, but Christian Slater is a loss. He's too much of a lightweight for this sort of stuff.
A long sit.
Grade: C
RED Rated "R" / 99 min. ===
You don't have to see either BLUE or WHITE to enjoy RED, director Krzysztof Kieslowski's final installment in his TROIS COLOURS trilogy. RED is also the final film for the director, who has announced his retirement. Chance encounters are one of the many ways that this captivating--and puzzling--film explores the idea that we are all connected in ways we never realize. Front and center is a love story between a fashion model (Irene Jacob) and a retired judge (Jean-Louis Trintignant). Subtitled.
Grade: A-
TO LIVE Not rated, suggested "PG-13" / 130 min. =======
If you're in the mood for another sweeping family saga ala LEGENDS OF THE FALL, then try TO LIVE. Director Zhang Yimou (RAISE THE RED LANTERN) recounts three decades of Chinese history as seen through the eyes of a poor, working-class couple (Ge You and Gong Li). You won't see anything like Brad Pitt here, but you *will* get a remarkably detailed portrait of Life Under Mao. Winner of two awards at last year's Cannes film festival including Best Actor. Subtitled.
Grade: A
-- Michael J. Legeros Raleigh, North Carolina
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