MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE
A film review by Michael John Legeros
Copyright 1996 Michael John Legeros
(Paramount)
Directed by Brian DePalma
Written by David Koepp and Robert Towne, from a story by David Keopp
and Steven Zaillan
Cast Tom Cruise, Emmanuelle Beart, Jon Voight, Vanessa Redgrave,
Henry Czerny, Ving Rhames, Jean Reno, Kristin Scott-Thomas,
Emilio Estevez
MPAA Rating "PG"
Running Time 110 minutes
==
Though you can't take your eyes off of it, director Brian DePalma's hotly anticipated adaptation of the classic '60's spy series is a misfire of near-colossal proportions. *Huge* amounts of effort and talent are up on the screen and, yet, the movie fails to meet the most-simple of narrative standards: it doesn't draw us into the characters. Period. Minutes pass, scenes change, but that crucial connection never happens. Blame the lousy pre-credits opening, for starters. What the hell are we supposed to make of a surveillance expert (Emilio Estevez) watching a black-and-white video of what appears to be a bad Russian soap opera? Huh? This terrible sequence was reportedly *much* more elaborate, until the test audiences got hold of it. God help us. Now, the scene runs about five minutes and that's all the introduction we get. Almost no chance to identify the characters, nor assimilate the action, nor get a feel for the film's tone. Needless to say, the movie never recovers from this misstep.
What we later learn is that said soap stars are really a team of secret agents. They work for Mr. Phelps (Jon Voight, looking very old), a shadowy government figure who must owe Blockbuster Video some serious bucks because all of his tapes keep self-destructing. (The character of Mr. Phelps is one of the few elements retained from the television series; another is composer Lalo Schifrin's cool theme music.) The story has Mr. Phelps accompanying his IMF team on a doomed mission to Prague, to intercept someone who's selling the real names of secret agents. (Said list is largely responsible for turning the plot screws. Would you like some fries with your MacGuffin?) Problems ensue, bad things happen, and the team's point man, Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise), is immediately suspected as a traitor. Notice that I'm not telling much of the plot. The rest of the story has Hunt on the run, ducking his superiors while trying to catch the real bad guys.
The whole thing is far more convoluted than I can describe here. And the tone isn't much better. DePalma tries be both serious and silly and it doesn't work. The major components of the movie are too heavy; the handsome cast, the top production values, etc. all but squeeze the cheese right out of the film. So, instead of integration, we get a study in contrasts: fine actors like Kristin Scott-Thomas playing straight to somebody wearing obvious old-age make-up. Or, those imposing international locales that are announced to the audience in gigantic letters on title cards. Or, my favorite, the dramatic confrontations and the crazy angles that capture them. Holy tilted camera!
The camera tilts are absurdly appropriate, though, given the film's low Believability Factor (BF). When Cruise's character escapes from a restaurant, for example, he blows up an aquarium that releases enough water to supply a small city. (BF=0.09) And there are *many* such goofs, gaffes, and general "head-scratchers" scattered about. Respectable writers David Koepp (JURASSIC PARK), Steven Zaillan (SCHINDLER'S LIST), and Robert Towne (CHINATOWN) are listed in the credits. I wonder which one was responsible for that amazing "Internet magic" that Hunt performs? Or who thought it believable that Hunt would retreat to a government-sponsored safe house, after said government was now hunting *him*? As the movie is nearly devoid of any humor, these unintentional amusements-- like the sight of Vanessa Redgrave wearing what's either a bad wig or a bad dye job-- provide some critically needed chuckles. (One *intentional* gas is the film's standout sequence, involving the theft of a computer file from a secured room at the CIA Headquarters. It's vintage DePalma and *far* more exciting that the speed-train-helicopter-into-the-Chunnel-chase finale.)
Still, MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE should generate both good returns and good word of mouth. Working with an array of accomplished actors, lavish locales, and cool camera tricks, DePalma has created a convincing illusion. He's made the quintessential Hollywood product: a well- produced and well-promoted thrill machine. If the applause at the screening that I saw is any indication, *many* people are going to enjoy this movie and many people are going to think that they've really *seen* something. For the rest of the us-- those already sensitive since that terrible TWISTER blew through-- we can roll with what's awful and still have some fun. After all, the director *is* Brian DePalma. He knows how to handle trash and turn it into something that's entirely watchable.
Grade: C-
--
Mike Legeros - Raleigh, NC
legeros@nando.net (h) - legeros@unx.sas.com (w)
Visit me in MOVIE HELL
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