Dear God (1996)
A film review by Scott Renshaw
Copyright 1996 Scott Renshaw
DEAR GOD -------- Grade: D // Read a Good Book Instead
(Paramount)
Director: Garry Marshall. Screenplay: Warren Leight, Ed Kaplan. Producer: Steve Tisch. Starring: Greg Kinnear, Laurie Metcalf, Maria Pitillo, Tim Conway, Roscoe Lee Browne, Hector Elizondo.
MPAA Rating: PG (profanity). Running Time: 105 minutes.
Reviewed by Scott Renshaw.
Every movie-goer, whether he or she is conscious of it or not, has a list of warning flags that a movie could be trouble. Sometimes it is as simple as an actor or genre to avoid; other times, it can be a more subtle realization, like the risk of anything promoted with a soundtrack tie-in or a rave from Jeff Craig of "Sixty Second Preview." Critics inevitably have longer lists by virtue of more extensive film experience, and I think I have just added another item to mine: beware of films with half a dozen gratuitous cameo appearances. The problem with that particular caveat is that by the time you are in the theater and subjected to the guest star deluge, it is too late. DEAR GOD, a miserable excuse for a "feel-good" comedy, is a film with no sense of direction whatsoever, causing a barrage of cameos to feel all the more desperate.
Greg Kinnear stars as Tom Turner, an inveterate gambler and con man trying to pay off his debts with small-time scams. When he is nabbed in the act, he is given an ultimatum by the judge: get an honest job or face jail time. Tom uses family connections to land a job in the Los Angeles Post Office as holiday temporary help, assigned to the dead letter office where burnouts like Dooley (Tim Conway) and Rebecca (Laurie Metcalf) collect undeliverable mail, including letters addressed to God. When Tom inadvertently answers one of those letters, his co-workers see an opportunity to put spark back into their jobs by bringing some holiday cheer to people asking God for help. Tom, however, is unsure how to handle the unfamiliar role of good Samaritan, even as publicity swarms around the Post Office's "God Squad."
DEAR GOD might have had a chance at being moderately amusing if it had stuck to the formula of a lovable rascal who undergoes a conversion. Kinnear's smirking wise-guy persona is perfectly suited to the role of Tom, and he can also trot out a chastened charm which ingratiates himself with the audience. The problem is that the car wreck of a script churned out by Warren Leight and Ed Kaplan includes so many minor characters and superfluous side plots that DEAR GOD becomes thoroughly incoherent. Tom is given five sporadically interesting cohorts in the dead letter office where two truly interesting ones would have been a significant improvement, and even though both Laurie Metcalf and Tim Conway have nice comic moments, they are playing essentially the same character. Naturally there is also a love interest (Maria Pitillo), a divorcee with a distressingly precious young son (Seth Mumy); Tom also has a blind mother (Rue McClanahan) to care for. Things get so bloated that the sub-plot involving Tom's loan shark (John Pinette) vanishes into thin air when he is hit by a bus, as though even director Garry Marshall realized there was no screen time to spare.
For a film overflowing with diversions, DEAR GOD is far from overflowing with laughs. Since none of the business swirling around the actual plot of DEAR GOD is remotely funny, Marshall spends most of the film finding places to insert random celebrities. Here we have a holiday parade featuring Tony Danza, David Hasselhoff and (pulled out of mothballs) "Happy Days'" Erin Moran; there we have Jack Klugman as a suicidal old man. Here we have Dr. Joyce Brothers appearing on television; there we have O. J. Simpson prosecutor Christopher Darden as a court broadcaster. Even Marshall himself gets in on the act, appearing as the Postmaster General. The effect of these cameos is not simply to distract you from what the film is about, but to convince you that they _are_ what the film is about. DEAR GOD may begin as a comedy, but it rapidly turns into a bus tour of Hollywood where the only response it inspires is pointing and giggling every time a familiar face appears.
There are a few amusing bits in the courtroom finale which finds Tom on trial for tampering with the mail, notably a goofy piece of acting by Metcalf which at least will shake you out of your stupor. When we are expected to get emotionally roused, however, by the fact that every postal worker in Southern California is rallying behind Tom (none of the people helped by the "God Squad" appears to give a damn), you wonder if anyone has any control over where DEAR GOD is going. You might find yourself wishing it would turn into the re-hash of MIRACLE ON 34th STREET it seems headed for, so that at least it might make _cliched_ sense, only you wouldn't be surprised to find Lance Ito turning up as the judge, or Buddy Hackett as Kris Kringle.
On the Renshaw scale of 0 to 10 error mails: 2.
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