PICTURE PERFECT (20th Century Fox) Starring: Jennifer Aniston, Jay Mohr, Kevin Bacon, Olympia Dukakis, Illeana Douglas, Kevin Dunn. Screenplay: Arleen Sorkin & Paul Slansky and Glenn Gordon Caron. Producer: Erwin Stoff. Director: Glenn Gordon Caron. MPAA Rating: PG-13 (profanity, adult themes, sexual situations) Running Time: 105 minutes. Reviewed by Scott Renshaw.
[Overheard in the rec room at the Old Chestnuts Rest Home for Over-Worked Film Premises in Boca Raton, Florida:]
MISMATCHED BUDDY ACTION COMEDY: Hey, D. H., I hear we may be getting a new arrival soon.
DIE HARD-IN-A-CONFINED-SPACE THRILLER: I don't know, Buddy, it feels pretty cramped around here as it is.
BUDDY: Well, this one definitely needs a break. The name is Romantic Comedy Where a Couple Pretends to Be Together for an Ulterior Motive, or some such.
D. H.: That's a mouthful.
BUDDY: Yeah, and she's been a busy little thing. CAN'T BUY ME LOVE, GREEN CARD, PRETTY WOMAN, HOUSESITTER...why, she even showed up in a cameo already this summer, in MY BEST FRIEND'S WEDDING. The latest is called PICTURE PERFECT, starring that darling little Jennifer Aniston from "Friends."
D. H.: She's a looker, all right.
BUDDY: She plays an unmarried advertising executive named Kate Mosley who is feeling pressure from every direction to settle down. Her mother (Olympia Dukakis) nags her, her boss (Kevin Dunn) suggests that only "stable" employees will get the choice assignments, and the office Lothario (Kevin Bacon), who gets Kate all hot and bothered, is only interested in girls who are unavailable.
D. H.: Sounds like young Kate needs a mate, or at least the appearance of one.
BUDDY: You guessed it, D. H. Enter Nick (Jay Mohr), a nice young fellow with whom Kate had a picture taken at a wedding. Everyone is led to believe that Nick is Kate's long-distance fiance, which works out fine until Nick becomes a minor celebrity and everyone wants to meet him. So Kate finds Nick and asks him to play the part. And predicaments ensue.
D. H.: Predicaments...ha! Running through broken glass in bare feet from armed terrorists, now _that's_ a predicament.
BUDDY: Yes, well...anyway, Miss Aniston is fetching enough in the lead role, with that kind of frazzled charm Sandra Bullock turned into stardom. The script by Arleen Sorkin, Paul Slansky and Glenn Gordon Caron has a few clever moments, and Caron's direction is well-paced. What really makes it worth a look is an engaging, low-key performance by Jay Mohr as Nick. It's uncommon to find an actor who can make earnestness interesting, or who can make an audience root for him by sheer force of his good nature, despite an under-written role. And we know that's not the only angle Mohr can work, since he did a fine job of playing a completely slime in JERRY MAGUIRE.
D. H.: Well, then, what's the problem?
BUDDY: The problem, as we both know, is that a script has to be better than that to keep audineces watching when you know exactly how the story is going to end. It's only a matter of time before the two phony lovers figure out they should be real lovers, and someone learns an Important Lesson along the way. Actually, everyone in PICTURE PERFECT learns an Important Lesson along the way, undergoing an 11th hour conversion so that there isn't a single moderately unlikeable character remaining by the closing credits. Only Mohr seems like a genuinely decent person; everyone else reads the lines of a genuinely decent person because the formula demands it.
GRITTY, PROFANE CRIME CAPER (from the corner): Hey, will you two shut the *&%$ up before I blow you the *&%$ away?
BUDDY: Sorry. Anyway, it's a cute enough little picture, but it strains that thin premise to its limits. She could certainly stand a few months here.
D. H.: I have to agree with you there.
BUDDY: You see, even though we seem completely different, I knew we had something in common all along.
D. H.: Yippee-ki-yay, mother...
On the Renshaw scale of 0 to 10 old chestnuts: 6.
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