HERCULES 1997
A film review by Timothy Voon
Copyright 1997 Timothy Voon
1 :-( for the beef cake
2 :-) :-) for the damsel in distress
Featuring the voices of: Tate Donovan, Joshua Keaton, Roger Bart, Danny DeVito, James Woods, Susan Egan, Rip Torn, Samantha Eggar, Bobcat Goldthwait, Matt Frewer Directors: Ron Clements and John Musker Screenplay: John Musker, Ron Clements, Bob Shaw, Don McEnery, Irene Mecchi Music: Alan Menken Lyrics: David Zippel
I was excited when I heard that Disney's next new animated classic "Hercules", would be brought to us by the creators of "Alladin". I unrealistically expected material that carried the same humour, style and wit; instead I found substance more reminiscent of a "Care Bear" movie. I didn't realise that there were so many hues of "pastel" until I visited "Mt Olympus" where every god and demigod is colour coded by bright blues, oranges, reds and greens, embalmed in a shimmer of gold (to show they are gods, and not just colour pencils). Perhaps these artists have become tired of pencilling the realistic cartoon feel we have come to expect form Disney; but going to the other extreme, and ending up with something of an "Asterix" comic is rather amusing.
The next annoying feature was the use of "Gospel music" to help liven a "Greek Tragedy"? Those damn sexy muses kept singing - "That's the Gospel Truth" at the end of every commentary song, which left me wandering whether Jesus Christ was going to suddenly make an entrance???? He didn't.
About the characters.
Hercules is boring, clumsy and pure muscle with no brain. Sure this is a "Coming of Age" movie where, boy becomes man, freak becomes famous, geek becomes hero blah blah blah. Yeah, but in truth "We Don't Need Another Hero". So I kept wishing Tina Turner would burst onto the screen and do a number. She didn't.
Hades, looks like a creation from a "Beavis and Butthead" episode, and may be mistaken for their missing triplet "Matchstick", if given half a chance. Sure James Woods has a nice low, droll voice; who spits snippets of wry cutting one liners, making him a hell hole of a tough Don; but when compared to other recent Disney villains like "Jafar" and "Ursula", he pales.
The two imps "Pain" and "Panic" come only second on my scale of annoying, failed sidekick generated humour. Ranked first is still the poodle and racoon from "Pochahontas". They weren't allowed to speak in that movie, so perhaps these imps should have kept their mouth shut throughout this one.
By far the most interesting character is "Meg", who exudes sensuality with every hip swing, head toss, and eye blink. Whose "come ons" and tantalising teasing makes Hercules' muscles go hard. Perhaps the movie should have centred more around her, because without her Hercules would have been pure meatballs without the spaghetti. Meg's musical number with the Muses is probably this movie's highlight. I started to yawn when the Hydra's head started to multiply by the thousands.
So "Hercules" has not quite lived up to the myth in set out to be. It's not as romantic as "Beauty and the Beast"; not as humorous or lively as "Alladin"; not as thoughtful and sensitive as "Hunchback"; not about silly lions; but it's still way, way, way, way better than that little Indian princess.
Timothy Voon e-mail: stirling@netlink.com.au
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