EVENT HORIZON 1997
A film review by Timothy Voon
Copyright 1997 Timothy Voon
8 :-( :-( :-( :-( :-( :-( :-( :-( for potentially the worst movie
I've seen this year
Cast: Laurence Fishburne, Sam Neill, Kathleen Quinlan, Joely Richardson, Richard T. Jones, Jack Noseworthy, Jason Isaacs, Sean Pertwee Director: Paul Anderson Screenplay: Philip Eisner
This movie works on pure horror and special effects. Both of which score zilch when the mind is continually bombarded by wave upon wave of shocking graphic gore. Is there a story line? Yes and no. YES, it is the tale of an exploration ship known as the "Event Horizon", capable of travel through a self-generated Black Hole. After being missing for seven years, it reappears. Apparently the ship has been to Hell and back, and NO it shouldn't have made a re-appearance.
There seems to be no limit to the human imagination when it comes to horror. Sam Neil's face is mutilated to the point where Freddy Kruger could be mistaken for Ronald McDonald in comparison. The simple scarred face is no longer shocking enough. The eyes must also be gorged out for added effect. Why not go all the way and remove the nose and tongue as well. That way we would be spared the mumbo jumbo dialogue, and the putrid stench that this movie creates. Let me mention a few horrific moments of wasted movie time.
The "Silence of the Lambs" scene. This time the female gender is spared the skinning process. Instead we have an average sized Caucasian male who is skinned alive, before his carcass is poetically sprawled on the butchering table. The rest of him dangles on a hook above the body, giving "hung and dry" a new meaning.
The "Carrie" scene - a simple bucket of blood has become cliche. This time we have a torrential river of crimson red, which floods and submerges its characters. This is definitely what the blood bank needs.
Now for something not seen too often in Mainstream cinema. The "Body Mutilation Orgy Scene", which was unsuspectingly thrown at the audience. We have the naked, mutilated bodies of the missing crew running about the ship, ripping each other's insides out; and I don't just mean the eyes. I figured that this must have been the substitute sex scene, cause the actors get to take their clothes off.
I won't forget to mention the "Blow the boy from the inside out" scene. Where once again we watch a nice young man having his eyes and veins explode in a pressure lock. There we go with the eyes again. Fetish, fetish. fetish.
Now tell me, was I meant to enjoy the movie, or merely gag in the aisle where I was sitting. I'm not a great connoisseur of food, but I guess what is considered one man's vomit, is another man's creme de la creme. Believe me, this movie leaves a very bitter taste in the mouth.
Are the actors worth mentioning? No. After portraying such used and abused characters, whose bodies have no less been put through a meat grinder, anonymity would be the kindest option. As for the director Paul Anderson, enough with the exploding eyes and bloody torrents, we have no wish to view the best left unseen effects of playing "Mortal Kombat" - a much better movie if you ask me. If I wanted to scare myself, I could have stayed at home and played "Peek-a-Boo" with a one year-old child.
Timothy Voon e-mail: stirling@netlink.com.au
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